I HAVE A DREAM
I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up... live out the true meaning of its creed. We hold these truths to be self-evident that all men are created equal.
Martin Luther King, Jr.'s (Aug. 28, 1963).
Dreams are born with human beings, humans die but dreams remain forever. I am narrating my dream story born with me at freezing season of winter January1959, in a Hut (Jhugi) made of mud and straws. After 6 years, my parents put me in a Primary Government School about 1.5 miles far from my home. There existed a little jungle between school and my home; often my dad escorted me up to the end of the jungle. My life story in pursuance of a dream started from that single room school, made by mud bricks, in front of a road and a canal to the left. My school building was devoid of boundary wall and any facility of toilet. After school I used to swim usually in canal with my school fellows especially in summer season, while at home I mostly used to work in the fields with my parents.
Dreams, only dreams in the dusk, Only the old remembered picturesOf lost days when the day's loss, Wrote in tears the heart's loss.
‘ Carl Sandburg’
As I grew, words, sights and sounds made meaning for me; I started feeling the impact of respect and love, from community and from my school teachers. To them, I was some very special child. Their kind treatment gave me much confidence, pride, encouragement and inspiration for life and people. The encouraging behavior I received from them was mostly because my uncle, who was a school teacher, and he was teacher of majority of my teachers in the school. My great uncle passed away in early fifties amid his career and I was born a few years back. My parents gave me my teacher uncle’s name, and because of that name every body showed me love and respect. Since that time it became a dream for me to become teacher, like my great uncle.
I dream of any things that one day I'll know, I dream of the freedom: a dream I won't let go, I dream of my future and marvel at my pride As my heart is flying and singing inside.
‘Twilight Whispers’
Thus in this journey of life, my dream of becoming a teacher ultimately materialized in 1990, when I joined a Government college in Karachi as lecturer. I was more than happy to achieve that milestone. This achievement proved a profound source of joy for me; I felt as if I kissed the Peak of Himalaya Mountain.
Once in the dream of a night I stoodLone in the light of a magical wood, Soul-deep in visions that poppy-like sprang; And spirits of Truth were the birds that sang, And spirits of Love were the stars that glowed, And spirits of Peace were the streams that flowed In that magical wood in the land of sleep.
‘Sarojini Naidu’
In fact that was my fantasy, the reality was quite contrary. That time Karachi was victim of severe lingual riots. Almost Every part of the city was disturbed. Innocent citizens were targeted, tortured and brutally killed without any reason. Terrorism ruled the time. I guessed educational institutions might be spared and teachers might be treated as teachers, but I was wrong. In my college a dominant student political group, backed by a local powerful political party, threatened those of us who did not belong to their ethnicity. The situation made me sick and I felt my life on stake. At night I used to experience the nightmares. I dreamt as if wolves were chasing me to grab and tear into pieces.
I dream of rainbows, Bright in the sky, I dream of lightning, together we cry,
I dream of flowers, I feel such delight, I dream of spiders, and I scream with fright, I dream of fish, swimming in the sea, I dream of sharks, coming after me, I dream of lambs, frolicking around, I dream of wolves, Hunting, no sound, ...
‘Cathryn Martin’
I was in a fix. I faced two difficulties simultaneously. On one hand as a novice teacher, unexposed to the pedagogical skills while on other side I felt continuously terrified. These beginning days of my career were dull, isolated and lonely. I regretted, “O my God! This is the Teaching profession I had been dreaming of since my childhood”. All good images associated with this profession were almost cracked. In the prevailing circumstances I could only visualize the blurred future and the deep dark ways ahead. Just After a few days of the beginning of my teaching career I had almost decided to quit my teaching profession. It is rightly held, In fact, nearly half of all new teachers leave teaching within the first five years (Boles & Troen, 2002). Another reality regarding novice teacher’s choice either to stay or leave is directly linked with principal’s relations with them. According to Mauer and Zimmerman (2000), novice teachers’ progress through an array of emotions, beginning with anticipation and moving through four phases known as survival, disillusionment, rejuvenation, and reflection. By modeling advocacy and empathy, principals assist teachers in navigating this process.
Fortunately I got support from my principal and senior teachers who guided and mentored me. A Professor of English literature and my friend gave me great psychological support; senior professor of commerce helped me in the field of pedagogy, and the in charge principal provided me security as much as he could. Their support made me confident; it made me start working normally.
Stay with me forever and together we’ll cope, Because when I dream of you, I dream of hope, Dream awhile with me and together we’ll see, Not all dreams are bad, so dream along with me.
‘Cathryn Martin’
As per guidance of senior colleagues, I teach my students without any bias. I practiced teaching to learn more than teaching. I started observing student behavior towards their study and other related aspects of social life. My friendly behavior and attitude of tolerance with my students paved for me way to search out the solutions and remedies of many an alarming question. Thus the students who threatened me confided into me like my friends. They respected me from very core of their heart. Moreover same students who threatened me apologized for their past behavior. That was an amazing experience for me through which I realized the power of teaching. I believe my emotional, social, and intellectual growth, during the three beginning years of my career as lecturer. This was time of hope and despair, I confronted risks, learned to survive to dominate and teach even in a highly stressful scenario. Here I found my new set of teaching family; they taught me how to laugh out the fear, to overcome the stress. Here I knew that our informal discussions are as important as our reading. The Colleagues’ guidance in the pedagogical areas, their moral support, provision of security, their valuing me as a family member influenced me to the extent to change my life style and thinking.
Thus, I resuscitate to start loving my profession. Now I have started understanding why people loved my uncle teacher and me his name sake. I have never thought of changing my profession, I have a renewed outlook and multiplied awe towards this sacred profession. My love for teaching and learning inspired me to team up with ESRA as a master trainer for head teachers and administrators. Thus the admission in my M.Ed. Programme here in AKU IED is the continuity of that dream, the dream to be a teacher.
Conclusion
To day when I peep back in my past life and consider the significant events occurred in my personal and professional life, I value my dreams and commitment, restless struggle, and my thirst for learning which paved the way towards my present status. Evaluating my past life connecting with present practices when I look towards future, I am visualizing all rainbow colors shining in my coming life.
REFERENCE
Boles, K.C. & Troen, V. (2002). Who’s Teaching Your Children: Why the Teaching Crisis is Worse Than You Think and What Can Be Done About It. New Haven: Yale University Press.
Boms, D. (2010, January 16). RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN THE PRINCIPAL AND A NOVICE TEACHER. Retrieved from the Connexions Web site: http://cnx.org/content/m33450/1.1/
King, M. (1963, Aug. 28). The I Have a Dream Speech Message posted to http://www.usconstitution.net/dream.html
Martin, C. (1991, Feb. 24). Dream A While with Me Message posted to http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/dream-a-while-with-me/
Mauer, E., & Zimmerman, E. (2000). Mentoring new teachers. Principal.
Naidu, S. (2006, Jan.). Dream Poem Message posted to http://www.poetseers.org/themes/poems_about_dreams/
Sandburg, C. (n.d.). Dreams in the dusk Message posted to http://www.famouspoetsandpoems.com/poets/carl_sandb...
Whispers, T. (1991, Nov. 30). Everybody dreams Message posted to www.poemhunter.com/poem/everybody-dreams/
APPENDIX
